Peace-making

“Blessed are the peacemakers . . ..” 

I turn 38 tomorrow.  As I think of 38 – late thirties, two years to forty, middle age, 20 year high school reunion, etc. I feel myself shifting into a new state.  I spent a lot of years gazing at my navel searching for my identity.  A lot of years spent in school avoiding my fear of failure.  My motto, “When I get ___________ figured out/accomplished, then I will start doing something.”  A lot of time spent waiting and preparing before I could really start living.  And perhaps this is what the first part of life is about – figuring out who we are and what role we are to play in the human story.  Maybe it is that am now in my late thirties, but something is nudging me to stop waiting and start doing.   

This is not to say nothing has been accomplished to date or that the past is irrelevant, but I am noticing a different kind of stirring and it started with hearing the phrase, “Blessed are the peacemakers.”   I am called to take an active part in bringing about the Kingdom of God – an active participation in the reign of God – What am I doing?  How am I being a peacemaker?  How am I bringing peace into the world?  These are questions of action.  What am I doing? 

I believe the question of doing begins with how I am being.   Am I at peace?  If I could wrap up the last few weeks of my life, I would say I am peaceful.  The sunny days and warm temperatures have certainly helped.  But there is more – I am balanced and happy.  The pillars that feed my peace were in place – reading, writing, running, and being productive around the house.  The peace suckers were absent – obsessively watching Netflix, lying on the couch, taking naps when I do not need them.  The peace suckers are also depression feeders and contribute to a vicious cycle of self-loathing, emotional eating, irritability, and general malaise.  In other words, I was not so fun to be around and definitely not promoting peace. 

 

Filling my life with peace suckers leads to me living in my cave and avoiding intimate contact with others.  In contrast, peace fillers – that which clears away my own garbage so that I can be a physical, emotional, and spiritual presence for others naturally fosters peace making.  Being a peace-bearer leads to peace-making.  Being leads to doing.

My list of peace suckers:

Looking at my cell phone; playing solitaire on my phone; watching too much television; laziness; worrying about what others think of me; unresolved conflict.

And the peace fillers:

Reading; writing; meditation/prayer; running/working out; taking care of people; listening to people’s stories; productivity; going to church; playing with my kiddos; deep and honest conversations with friends.

When I am filled with peace, I cannot help but want to share it with the world around me.    May the peace of Christ be with you and your spirit.  May we identify and weed out the peace suckers and keep our focus on the peace fillers.